We need to talk
Confrontation is not an easy endeavor for most people. The difficulty in confrontation leads to avoidance, compromise, and sometimes sacrifice. There are two types of people on earth. Those who have the world revolving around them, and those who walk on eggshells. Obviously those who have the world revolving around them do not struggle with confrontation, but those who walk on eggshells might have to suffer, just for their fear of confrontation.
The good thing however is that these two personalities are not set in stone in the lives of people. Yes, the environments we grow up in influence our personalities (whether we’ll come out bold or whether well come out timid.). Our levels of financial security also influence our personalities. The point is, no one is bound for life to be a certain way. We can change. A person comfortable with confrontation could go through certain unprecedented traumatic events, that will leave them timid beyond recognition. An ordinarily timid person could also undergo a mental transformation, that will leave them bolder than they could have ever imagined.
The circumstances surrounding my life (background and experiences) have not made it easy for me to be confrontation-ready in life. I have lost, avoided, allowed some to cheat me and get away with it, all for the fear of confronting them. Moments when this fear cost me, are uncountable, and I’m still trying to remember a time when my fear of confrontation paid off.
Nevertheless, like the clouds, when they are filled with water, empty themselves upon the land, my desire to break out of this curse has begun to manifest into action.
I have surprised myself with the words that have left my mouth; phrases that show a once timid girl, standing up for herself with certainty. She knows what she wants, and does not want. Even better, she is unwilling to tolerate what she does not deserve. One of such phrases is, “we need to talk.” With this phrase, the confronted is ready, even for the unpleasant. This takes a mighty load of pressure off me, the confronter. I simply remind myself that I deserve to be heard, and not have my boundaries crossed — that I deserve that same grace that I so generously extend to others.
